News from Larger Visions

People frequently ask me, "How will I know if this is really what I want to do?" or say, "I have some skills for what it is that I want to do but other parts of it I can't stand. Am I on the right track?' Even when someone is certain about the direction they want their life to take there are moments of dissillusionment and apathy. In the complex experience of life, it is difficult sometimes to feel confident in anything. In this section, I talk about some common statements I hear from my clients when we start to discuss their larger visions and offer some ideas on how to get past each block.

"I have no idea where to start. Or, I do not have a deep sense of purpose in my life.":

A way to get started is to do more of what you love. If you are still unclear, make a list of all the things that you like to do. One by one, find time to do them. If you want to assess whether you are headed in the right direction, notice if you are engaged and excited with what you are doing on a regular basis. If you are most of the time then chances are you are going the right way.

Figuring ourt what we really want to do is not always as simple as just doing what we love because sometimes our habits prevent us from enjoying ourselves or even knowing what we might enjoy. To get a sense of how to begin to work with some of your limiting habits go to that section of this newsletter.

"I thought I loved this but all the joy is gone.":

This statement sometimes means that the vision itself needs adjustment but frequently this statement indicates that part of the process needs to be adjusted. Making this change may require getting to know yourself better. We get so used to living by outside expectation that sometimes we forget that there are other ways to get things done that might be better for us. Take some time to consider other possibilities. You might even enlist a friend to help come up with other ways of looking at things or other ways to do things.

Perhaps it is fear that is getting in your way. People have many responses to fear and one is to go numb. To help understand your fear ask yourself what is at risk if you attain you ideal vision for your life.

"I think I know what I want to do but I don't think that I have the skills necessary.":

Ask your self whether this statement is actually, objectively true? List the skills that are necessary for what you want to do. Check those that you possess. Are those that you don't learnable?

What if the gap between your skills and those necessary seems all too real? For example, you want to be a major league pitcher but can't throw a ball a yard even after years of practice. Ask yourself why you are focused on a vision for your life that is not aligned with your real abilities. Chances are this is a self-defeating belief pattern where you are setting yourself up to fail.

Or perhaps the answer is that you don't need to do it all yourself. Especially when it comes to starting a business, sometimes the best solution is doing what you do well and then hiring someone who can do with ease what you can't.